Fetish Love
by clink3k1
Summary: When all you love in a women is thier parts then who do you love? Kasey aka Kale the rancher has the answers to all that in his quest for the perfect parts. Icludes characters from Animal Parade.
1. Ruby Lips

Clink: Hello everyone, this is my first Harvest Moon story. Also I'll probably only do stories based off of Animal Parade because besides A wonderful life that's the only one I have (and remember).

Clank: Yes he has terrible memory.

Clink: Oh yeah this be my alter Ego Clank, much of a jerk if you ask me.

Clank: that's because you're no fun.

Clink: I can be fun you know that! I'm the one who made the Authors otes idea!

Clank: But I make em funny!

Clink: Gah forget it. Also I got this idea off a manga I love 20 cookies to whoever can say it.

Clank: Oh one more thing, I named the main character Kale unless he has a name I don't know.

Kale loved many things in life, mostly female parts. Some people called him a fetish farmer because when he wasn't mining, farming, ranching, or fishing he was often seen oogling at woman.

HE moved from his hometown not just to help the harvest goddess but to hope to find his beloved parts that fit his personal description. Fortunetly he got more than he was expecting, it started off when he visited the Ocarina Inn…

"Kale! You need to hurry up, we need to help the Harvest Goddess!" Finn buzzed around Kale's head.

Kale sighed, "I would love to do that Finn but we can't go to the Garmon Mine district until Bo fixes the bridge and he can't do that because Mr. Hamilton won't give Bo his Tool set until I meet everyone in town because he's a douche."

"A douche?" Finn asked.

"It's nothing you need to know" Kale said trying to keep a straight face. "Ok so we meet Irene, Ozzie, and Simon. So next we should check the Inn.

Kale opened the door. "Heelllooooo…his words slurred as his eyes spied a cute blonde haired girl in an apron.

"Part identification: Ruby Lip, 2.5 inches long, half an inch thick. PERFECT!" Kale grinned with a wide smile.

"Ah…Kale what was that?" Finn asked with and blank expression.

Kale ignored Finn his sparkling eyes looking at the waitress.

"Uhh hello?" A gray haired man waved his hand in front of Kale.

"Hmm…Oh, sorry I didn't see you. Uh…Hi I'm Kale the new rancher."

The man smiled. "Jake, owner of the Inn."

Kale's eyes wandered towards the girl again, this time however she was watching the stove on the other side of the counter along with two other women.

Jake noticed his looking around him. "Oh, this is my wife Colleen, my mother Yolanda and my daughter Maya."

"…Huh? I was to busy looking at the cute girl cooking over their"

Jake laughed. "That's my daughter Maya."

"She has beautiful lips." Kale then sat down. Maybe I'll have what she's cooking.

Jake looked up. "_Maybe this way we can evaluate her cooking"…_ he thought. "Sure why not."

"Maya, can you give Kale the dish you made."

Colleen and Yolanda both looked in awe at Kale. "You're a new a face. Are you some daredevil or something?" Colleen asked.

"No I'm the new rancher. I just came to meet everyone in town. Anyway Let's eat!" Kale licked his lips.

Everyone sweat dropped excluding Maya and Kale. "Ok Kale this is my first dish I made this afternoon. I made it with all my love~ she then kissed her hand presenting her dish. This looked like sewer water mixed with odd colored rocks.

"Uh…Kale this could be deadly…" Finn whispered.

"Nonsense Finn, she said she cooked it with love how bad could it be." He then shoveled mouthful after mouthful of the failed dish until the plate was clean.

"Yummy." Kale smiled and licked his lips.

Everyone again excluding Maya and Kale looked in awe. "Unbelievable, someone survived Maya's cooking." Colleen said.

Maya then became mad after hearing this. "Hey I'm not THAT bad of a cook it was probably the fire, lack of fire makes the food bad." She argued.

"Sounds more like an excuse to me." Yolanda said.

"But-But…"Maya stutters and begins to cry. "I try so hard…is it for nothing." She then wails out. "WAAAAAAH"

Everyone is shocked by Maya's sudden breakdown.

Kale then get's up ad hugs Maya. "Maya I loved the dish you made. It was delicious. He looked down at her. "Don't cry."

Maya's crying changed into soft whimpering. She wiped her tears and looked up at Kale and smiled. "T-Thank you, you're the only person that likes my cooking." She then leaned forward and kissed Kale on his cheek.

She blushed.

Kale's eyes glowed. "Kissed by the perfect lips…" he gleamed before waving goodbye to the cherry red Maya.

As he let Yolanda looked at Maya. "He's cute isn't Maya?" she teased.

Maya blushed redded and stomped her foot. "Stooooop…" she whined.

Finn buzzed around Kales blushing face. "So do you really like Maya's cooking?" he asked.

"It was ok not bad but not good either. But dang she's got the best lip's I've ever seen. She's so cute to." Kale grinned again. "Plus I got a kiss from those lips can't say I dislike that."

"Wait, so you only love Maya for her lips?"

Kale nodded. "Yeah something wrong with that?"

Finn stood silent. "No…but It might lead to some problems in the future…" Finn murmerd.

Clink: Well that was a lovely first chapter huh Clank?

Clank: Well I can't say I disliked it, so yeah it's ok to me. But uh…you still fail clink.

Clink: Why are you so mea to me!?

Clank: Because it's fun.


	2. Blackout Bottom

Clink: I'm Baaaack.

Clank: Heeeee's stupiiiid!

Clink: Ok I'm gonna count every time you insult me if it exceeds 10 I'm gonna rocket launch u into the stratosphere!

Clank: Suuuuuure ya will……STUPIDCRAZYMONKEYFACE!

Clink:…that's 3, 7 more to go.

"MMmmmm…" Kale groaned. I could really go for a drink right now. Looking at the ocean for so long makes me thirsty."

Finn fluttered around Kale. "C'mon Kale just two more places we have to visit. The clothing sto-

"BORING!" Kale whined.

"…Or the Ba-

"TO THE BAR!" He pointed and smiled. "everyone knows sexy ladies and drinks are sold at bars.

"Sexy?" Finn asked.

"Oh it's nothing you need to know…for now." He grinned and blushed a the same time.

"To the Bar!"

-One happy march to the bar later!-

"Ok that was the most disturbing walk to a bar I've ever seen." Finn looking like he saw a ghost. "I don't care, no one else saw it…I hope…" He looked both left and right before entering.

He entered as cheerfully and happily as normal. "HELOOOOOoooo.o…o…" he quieted down as his eyes darted towards something. He simply watched in enjoyment while poor Finn fell to the ground shocked.

"Ugh, I can't find it… it's to far under the cabinet. Let's see If…I can…reach…it…" A blond haired girl leaning over the floor her hands reaching under the table. Most notably however her backside extended in the air.

"Are you sure you can't see the card under there? I swore I dropped my credit card under there!" An brown haired bald man looking from the other side down also was leaning down.

"I can't maybe if I look just a little more…" She leaned over even more her brown leather pants straight in the air. It was almost too much for poor Kale to handle his nose began to bleed and started loosing consciousness.

"Part…Sighted…: Blackout Bottoms"…*THUD* he fell backwards onto floor lying dead.

"Ack! Kale! Kale wake up! What, did you have a heart attack!? Why cruel world!?" he sobbed whipping his face. "Wait I'm sure these bar tenders will save him!"

Unfortunately for Finn they still hadn't noticed. "Ok we're goanna have to move it." The bald man started pulling his sleeves.

"Are these people insane!?...I've got no other choice." Finn fluttered to the rack of beer bottles. Trying to pick it up. "Gah…So…Heavy…" he slowly flew towards Kale's unconscious body. "Ok 1…2…3!" he threw the bottle next to Kale's head. Making a loud CRASH, fortunately no glass cut him.

The blond haired girl then looked towards the crash and immediately noticed Kale's body.

"Oh my goodness! Dad! Dad! We need to get this guy to the clinic!"

"Can't it wait? My credit card is still under their." His hand still reaching.

"No dad his face is bleeding! You forgot to clean up the glass he could be really hurt!"

"…But-" he was cut off.

"Fine I'll bring him to the clinic myself." She picked him up having him lean against her. However the way he was leaned made his hand dangle behind her.

His arm starting swinging behind her with every step.

Finn began to panic. "Oh no at this rate his arm will smack into her!" Finn tried to get in the way of his swinging arm. That led to him getting smacked in the face with every step.

"Can't take *SMACK* the pain…*SMACK*"

He then fell to the ground exhausted. Kale's arm then swung closer and closer until…

*SMACK*

"Eep!" Kathy yelped. Her face turning a bright red when she felt the hand smack her backside.

At this Kale woke up. "A what happened!?" Kale's still bloody face looked next to him. "…You're cute…" he smiled.

The girl blushed and frowned. "Y-You can't just say things like that at random! A-And you're hurt we need to get you to the clinic." She seemed flustered.

"Hurt? I'm…" he then could feel his hand touching slightly the girls backside. Eh…Ow…ow…ow…ahowww…yeah you're right must have really hurt myself…" Kale feeling pretty good having a chance to get his hands close to that round firm behind.

"Hey I never caught your name, you're the new rancher right?" The girl asked.

"Well it is Kassey but I prefer Kale, It's my middle name." Kale smiled. "And yours?"

"It's Kathy,"

"It's nice to meet you,(and your butt)" he whispered.

" You to if you want to come see me I'm normally in Luna's shop or at the Bar."

"Lunas shop?"

"Yeah it's the clothing store right next to the bar. Luna's not hard to spot she's got blue hair you can't miss it."

"Blue hair?(sounds like a possible part I'm looking for…)"

"Yeah can't miss it. Now stop talking so we can get you to the clinic." She giggled a little.

Kale smiled before continuing his act. Soon his arm continued to swing until it SMACKED her again, except this time he begn to fall unconscious again.

"Sooo…Perfect….*THUD*"

Clink: I just want to let the audience know I am not the pervert here It's Clank

Clank: So what if I am? I'm only electronically human.

Clink: But think of the children!

Clank: I have 5 children that help me think of these stories.

Clink: What's wrong with you people!?


	3. Silky blue Curls

Clink: Clank you know it's not legal to have children working for you right?

Clank: Yes but that's in most countries.

Clink: you point is?

Clank: This is the internet Clink they can't arrest you for having children working for the internet Bill Gates says so.

ISP: This is the Internet Saftey Patrol we know you have children in there come out with your hands and or other limbs or body parts up!

Clank: DAMN you Bill Gates for lying to me!

Kale groaned as he limped out of the clinic. "How my head huuurts so much…." He rubbed the back of his head, after falling on it twice. "I'm heading to bed…"

Finn then buzzed in front of his face. "Hey we just need to go to the Tailor then we can go see the Harvest Goddess!"

Kale groaned. "Maybe if you slammed you head twice into the concrete you would change your opinion." He swatted Finn away then angrily grumbled.

Finn becoming desperate began to lie. "Look one of your parts went into the Tailor!"

Kale then turned his head. "Really where!? What kind!? Who!?" He then dashed from the bridge to the Tailor leaving Finn to cough in his dust. "Hey wait up!"

When Kale actually did get in his eyes were scanning the room. "Drat, all there is in here is an old lady and a bunch of clothes." Finn then finally caught up to Kale. He then grabbed the harvest sprite and frowned in his face. "Hey you lied to me I don't see my beloved parts in this room at all!" He tightened his grip around the Harvest sprites weak body

Finn chocked. "Maybe…the woman knows…*Wheeze*"

The old woman sighed. "Sory were not selling much at the moment…wait I haven't seen you around here lately…are you that new rancher everyone is talking about?" the woman adjusted her glasses.

"Yes my name is Kale, by any chance did a woman walk by here or anything, maybe with a gorgeous feature by chance?" Kale was desperately asking.

"Can you…please let go of me…" Finn was gasping for air.

"Yes you must be referring to my granddaughter Candace, she has beautiful blue hair. By the way my name is Shelly. My granddaughter is in the back-"

After that sentence Kale dashed to the door. "Thanks Shelly you're a life saver!"

"I hope your referring to me…I need air please…" Finn still gagging in Kale's palm.

When Kale poked his head inside he saw a woman sitting down sewing some fabrics together. More importantly he saw her hair.

" It's beautiful isn't it Finn!?"

Finn was now purple and barley breathing. "Let go of me…!"

"I know it's perfect right I mean it's sky-blue, it has perfect spring like coils in it, I have o touch it." He whispered.

He snuck up to her just behind her. "Then looked at the hand Finn was in. Finn what are you doing in my part grabbing hand!?" he then released Finn form his hand.

Finn gasped, "FRESH AIR AT LAST!"

"Quiet Finn or she'll hear us," he whispered. He then buried his hands into the hair. "Oh it's so soft…like silk…It's peeeeeerfect~!" he cooed to himself.

"EEEEEEK! W-W-What are you doing!? Get away from me!" She pulled her hair out of Kale's hands. "Wh-who are you…?" She looked terrified.

"Look what you did Kale you made her scared! He then slapped Kale on the face with his tinny hands."

Kale ignored him and tried to look innocent. "I'm sorry Your hair just looked so pretty that I just wanted to touch it is all." He smiled after he apologized. "It really is beautiful."

The girl blushed deeply. "O-O-oh…um thank you…" she gave a soft smile. "So…are you the new rancher in town? I'm…Candace" she still looked a little nervous.

"Name's Kale and yeah I'm the new rancher,…but I'm also an expert hair stylist!"

"Wait you're a hair stylist!?" Finn was stupefied.

"Really…? Then why did you come here?"

"Ehh…because I needed to find more exotic hair to use. Your hair is one of a kind and I would love~ to work with it!" This was one long lie but if it got him more time with that hair it was worth it.

Candace blushed again and her smile grew bigger this time. "Do you really think my hair is that special…? She blushed more with every thought. "Um…ok…I suppose It's ok you can work with it then." She sat down again her hair in my face.

I grabbed some combs and brushes. "I may not know what I'm doing but who gives a damn when you have hair like this!?" he thought to himself.


End file.
